Saturday, August 4, 2012

August movie offerings are slim


There isn’t much to get excited about in theaters for the next month.

I was looking at the release schedule and all I could thing was: “Blech.”

August is known as the dumping ground for movies that the studios think are going to do poorly. This month’s upcoming schedule clearly depicts that notion.

Besides ‘Total Recall’ – which debuted Friday – the rest of the month's offerings look sleep inducing. Of course, I should point out that I have no idea if ‘Total Recall’ will be good or bad – I just know it has Colin Farrell so I’m willing to sit through it.

Are there any releases that look good?

Let’s just say, there are no releases that look great but a few that I might be willing to catch On Demand in several months.

Here you go:

* Hope Springs: Tommy Lee Jones, Meryl Streep and Steve Carrell star in this story about a couple trying to find the spark in their relationship. The movies opens Aug. 8. Something tells me this isn’t going to appeal to the summer demographic – teenagers.

* The Bourne Legacy: This movie isn’t a reboot of the franchise. It’s just another character like Jason Bourne. This movie stars Jeremy Renner, an actor that is good in everything but one that might want to start saying no to some offers. The movie opens Aug. 10.

* The Campaign: I love Will Ferrell, but I’m not sure this movie is going to live up to the lofty standards he has set with other films. This movie is timely – with the presidential election coming up – but I don’t predict it does very well at the box office. Bring on ‘Anchor Man 2.’ The movie opens Aug. 10.

* Freelancers: Will Robert De Niro do anything for money now? I love the man, but come on. This film, which opens Aug. 10, pits him against Forest Whitaker and Curtis ’50 Cent’ Johnson. When will someone realize that rappers can’t act?

* The Odd Life of Timothy Green: This is a Disney film that is clearly going for the feel good factor about a couple that wishes for a child and then has a very special one pop up in their garden. The problem is, the movie – starring Jennifer Garner – looks emotionally manipulative and intellectually vacant. The movie debuts Aug. 15.

* The Expendables 2: Really, didn’t Sylvester Stallone say all he needed to in the first movie? I enjoyed the first film – and all the decrepit action stars from the first film return to face off with Chuck Norris and Jean Claude VanDamme (as well as the lesser Hemsworth brother) this time around. Despite everything I just said, I have a feeling this movie – which opens Aug. 17 – is going to do okay.

* Cosmopolis: Robert Pattinson tries to prove he’s more than a sparkly vampire. In material that is clearly too old for his target audience, I predict he’ll fail miserably. The movie opens Aug. 17.

* Premium Rush: Joseph Gordon-Levitt proves no one is infallible when choosing movie roles when he gets on a messenger bike and races from a crooked cop. Opens Aug. 24.

* Lawless: Tom Hardy and Shia LeBeouf playing bootlegging brothers in prohibition Virginia. That’s all you really need to know. Opens Aug. 29.

* The Possession: Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Kyra Sedgwick try to protect another creepy kid. Opens Aug. 31.

* The Tall Man: Jessica Biel tries to save children and, I’m sure, continues to prove she can’t act. Opens Aug. 31.

* The Good Doctor: Orlando Bloom tries to ugly himself up as a doctor who sets aside his ethics. Here’s the thing, Bloom is pretty to look at but vapid to listen to. Take from that what you will. Opens Aug. 31.

What do you think? Does this look like a depressing movie selection for August?

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