I don’t get all the hoopla about Fifty Shades of Grey.
It was a terribly written book with terribly boring
characters. To be fair, I only read the first book, but that was more than
enough for me to realize that it wasn’t my thing.
When you’re talking about the book, it failed as fiction
because it was so vapid and it failed as erotica because it just wasn’t hot.
Now that the book hoopla has all but disappeared, fans are
now turning their attention to the movie adaptation.
When news broke a few weeks ago that Sons of Anarchy actor
Charlie Hunnam had been cast – fans revolted. Interestingly enough, Hunnam is a
serious actor and he could have lent some gravitas to the role of Christian
Hunnam, though, didn’t like the attention he was getting
from the film – and the book’s crazed fans – and he dropped out of the role
last week. He cited a bevy of reasons for pulling out, but it was obvious he
didn’t want the attention the role would bring to him.
Dakota Johnson, the daughter of Melanie Griffith and Don
Johnson, earned the role of Anastasia
Steele. She is still in the film and, as
a relative unknown, she’ll probably be fine – although most of the online polls
I’ve seen have been lobbying for Alexis Bledel.
On Thursday it was announced that Jamie Dornan had won the coveted
role of Christian Grey. Who is Jamie Dornan? He’s a male model that I’ve seen
in exactly two things: Marie Antoinette and Once Upon a Time.
I think Dornan has a certain charisma about him and he’ll
probably be fine in the role. I still feel a little bad for him.
The Christian Grey role – and the Anastasia Steele role,
quite frankly – aren’t roles I would embrace as an actor. Why? They both look
like Showgirls-sized anchors around the necks of the actors that take them.
What do I mean by that? Ask Elizabeth Berkley if her career
ever rebounded after Showgirls. I think 50 Shades of Grey has bomb written all
over it – and it could ruin the careers of the actors attached.
There’s no way to get around the fact that 50 Shades of Grey
is soft-core porn. You don’t see the actors on those skin flicks on Cinemax
making it big after those movies – and I don’t think you’ll see the actors in
50 Shades of Grey overcoming the stigma of being in this movie.
Sure, the books have a contingent of teenage fans that don’t
know any better. I used to read V.C. Andrews as a kid, too, and 50 Shades of
Grey is really no different than V.C. Andrews. I also think the movie will be
just as much of a bomb as Flowers in the Attic was.
This movie has a lot going against it. First off, the buzz
has already died. If they wanted this movie to
be a box office hit, they would
have rushed it into production and released it a year ago.
Second, there’s going to be a certain stigma attached to this
film. A lot of people aren’t going to flock to the theaters to watch a film
about bondage. And those that are into those things can just order porn on
their home computers.
I’m actually hoping that Dornan pulls out of this project. I
think he’s a talented guy, and I don’t want to see his career ruined.
As it stands, this is one film I won’t be catching in
theaters or when it’s released on DVD. The book was bad enough, I have no
intention of seeing the film.
What do you think? Is 50 Shades of Grey going to be a box
office winner or loser?